Apathy of Late

[Geoffrey]

Good work G. Today I waited in line from 7am til 9am to have a blood test done because my thyroid gland is not releasing any hormone (hence my metabolism has shut down), then I went to try to get the phone company to fix my issues with the phone they gave me since I've been without any phone for over a week and the woman who was dealing with my issues was at a funeral and no one else could tell what she had done - so I have to wait another day, next I went to do a caregiving shift and my client fell down drunk the night before and broke her collar bone so I had to take her back to town for xrays and I have to load her wheelchair etc. and I have no energy, then waited 2 hrs. for her xray and got back and she had shit all over the sheets and nightgown last night because she drank too much and took a Percocet so she couldn't get to the bathroom, so I did a load of her laundry at the laundromat after I changed her sheets, then my son was stranded at the bus because he lost his bus pass so I went and got him and took him to his rented room which I help pay for because he can't get hired anywhere and won't fib just a bit on his application (he hasn't worked since his brother died five years and won't talk about his "stuff"); no one will hire him since he hasn't worked in five years and has no experience (he worked with his brother), then I stopped to buy power steering fluid with stop leak in it because my car's power steering is going out, now I decided to do a load of my laundry since I'm on a roll....I'll take my cheese now. xox

oh my giddy aunt, talk about stress, that practically wore me out just reading it. have to hand it to you, dar - compared to you my tribulations are just a snooze in a deckchair. sounds like we were made for each other, you and me. they say if you want something done ask the person who's the busiest. even with all i got on my plate i have been popping in and out of the internet, sending SMS messages, catching up with emails and chatting on skype to my daughter in morocco, and just on impulse even did a 50 x 70 painting of two people rockin' 'n' rollin' with a big colourful background like a target. it's a pity your son won't "fib" - was his father a vicar or what's wrong with him! xoxox

[dar]

I know G. What's with my Michael anyway? I can't get him to fib even on a resume. Just a little employment fib. But Mike said his brother Vince didn't have a "real" business the time he worked with him from 2005 to 2008 so it doesn't count. And Mike even said to me, "Are you trying to teach me to lie? What kind of mother does that?" Geez. And this is a kid who was diagnosed schizophrenic in 2010, but is now told he just had a "psychotic break" from smoking too much marijuana because he couldn't deal with grief. Now he can't find work and I don't know if he's clinically depressed or just lazy or to damn honest or does have some kind of mental illness that won't let him lie. Is that a mental illness?

I just want him to get a damn job. Doesn't everybody fib a bit to land a job?

[Geoffrey]

I know G. What's with my Michael anyway? I can't get him to fib even on a resume. Just a little employment fib. But Mike said his brother Vince didn't have a "real" business the time he worked with him from 2005 to 2008 so it doesn't count. And Mike even said to me, "Are you trying to teach me to lie? What kind of mother does that?" Geez. And this is a kid who was diagnosed schizophrenic in 2010, but is now told he just had a "psychotic break" from smoking too much marijuana because he couldn't deal with grief. Now he can't find work and I don't know if he's clinically depressed or just lazy or to damn honest or does have some kind of mental illness that won't let him lie. Is that a mental illness?

I just want him to get a damn job. Doesn't everybody fib a bit to land a job?

i can't understand why he won't lie, dar. you've got to have a serious talk with him. i brought my kids up to be habitual liars and they are now really quite good at it. anyone can be honest, that's easier than shitting in bed awake, but to spin a web of lies is an artform; it makes one think, uses one's imagination - it's a fantastic way of keeping the brain alive. start by telling him a wise man understands it's often kinder to tell a whopper than the cold truth, and then once he's swallowed that you can teach him how to make his body language fit in with the pack of lies he's telling. remember: bullshit baffles brains. do your utmost to cure him of this george washington syndrome, dar, because many people prefer to hear a load of crap than truth's brutal reality. xxx

[dar]

As I've thought about this concern of mine I think my son may have decided lying doesn't work since I'm so bad at it. Failure of the imagination. I have no talent for lying. I have been caught in every lie I ever tried to tell; tangled in my own web. (Or maybe because when he was little he thought I could read his mind because I always could tell when he was lying. Now I can't get him to tell a little white lie.

Plus, I've smoked cigarettes, ate junk food and have a tattoo on my back. Low-life that I am. And my girls ended up hating smoking, eating healthy and exercising regularly. Plus, they would never "ink" themselves.

What have I done wrong for heaven's sake?!

[Geoffrey]

As I've thought about this concern of mine I think my son may have decided lying doesn't work since I'm so bad at it. Failure of the imagination. I have no talent for lying. I have been caught in every lie I ever tried to tell; tangled in my own web. (Or maybe because when he was little he thought I could read his mind because I always could tell when he was lying. Now I can't get him to tell a little white lie.

i doubt there's anything wrong with him that a good hard slap across the backs of his legs wouldn't put right. explain to him that he's not normal, that lying is just role playing, like what an actor does. even leonard cohen says in one of his songs that he cheats and lies, that he does what he has to do to get by - and the good book was written by a whole bunch of liars. remember, take one step at a time. help him progress from a small white lie to a big white lie, and a big white lie is just the same as a small black one.

Plus, I've smoked cigarettes, ate junk food and have a tattoo on my back. Low-life that I am. And my girls ended up hating smoking, eating healthy and exercising regularly. Plus, they would never "ink" themselves. What have I done wrong for heaven's sake?!

well, don't give up. a malfunctioning family is the result of too little discipline. always 'coincidentally' have a few loose cigarettes lying around near an ashtray and a box of matches. show them articles where doctors say wine is good for the body and start by pouring just half a glass for them. as they gradually loosen up mix some cognac with it, and jog with them towards a 'burger king', and then show them the wonderful art displayed in your local tattoo parlour. remember: softly softly catchee monkey. you just need to be determined. make a plan, stick to it - and never take no for an answer. you can do this, dar.

[lizzytysh]

Yes, and do let us know [at least me] both of you, Geoffrey and Dar.
Just enjoyed my AM laughs.
I was told yesterday when I got my oil changed and a new tire, that my transmission is leaking. They don't fix transmissions at that place, so I'm guessing it's true.
Hope that your activities of late aren't a foreboding omen for how things will go for me.

It seems [on a serious note, Dar] that your Michael could qualify for Disability Compensation. If he could agree to apply that could help. If not, perhaps, some tough love might be in order at some point. It MIGHT motivate him. It appears that he's frozen in clinical depression which appears to have caused him to be functionally unable to cope with the 'normal' demands of everyday life. That's my unsought, unasked for, but well intended, input. My heart is with you.

[dar]

Thanks for the thoughts Liz. But, trust me, all has been looked into. Mike answers interviews with, "Yes. I've smoked pot. And I will smoke pot before I take any pills. Those pills will kill you." The honesty part I talked about. So much for free money. So, it's hoping someone will give him a chance on a job. He has issues but he's able and applying everywhere. I wouldn't help him if he wasn't trying. He doesn't ask me to help; I just do. I know, codependent that I am.

Transmission troubles. Not good and damn expensive. Bad knews all around.

Take care.

[Geoffrey]

He doesn't ask me to help; I just do.

that is the maternal instinct kicking in, dar - an automatic need to protect one's offspring. men aren't dogged by such primitive forces; their contribution to raising a child is finished after they have mated.

[lizzytysh]

Yeah, Dar, I had a feeling these thoughts of mine weren't new to your thinking or actions, or his... but I offered them on the off-chance [of "one never knows"] just in case. Worth mentioning and all that. I understand and if you took offense, I hope you'll forgive me for butting in with 'good advice' and all that jazz. I apologize. It's a hard road to hoe for you and your maternal instincts are understandable. I hope that somehow, some way, things will work out for him and for you. It has to be painful for you to see him suffering in his way. Unresolved grief can wreak unbelievable emotional havoc. I know that from my own experience.

And, Geoffrey, I don't really believe that men are just done with it after the mating has taken place. I know my Dad had deep concern for me throughout my life... and, likewise, I know you have for your children, as well. It 'sounds good,' though, to be cavalier like that, though, doesn't it


All the best,
and I'll butt out now
[though my transmission issues don't hold a candle to yours, or even g's, Dar],
Lizzie

[dar]

No offense taken. And no comparisons taken either. Everyone is dealing with something. I only let loose with the rant to make a connection with G on the "what a day" level. I'm off the whine now.

Enjoy the gathering in Hydra!

[lizzytysh]

Good... that's a relief.
Thanks... I surely will!!!

Hope your "What a day" is better.

[Kush]

Will be visiting and posting here less often. I tried to stimulate discussion. No sense continuing to do so.

Hi Steven,

There is a poem or part of a poem by Rabindranath Tagore that goes "If none shall come on hearing your call, then walk alone, walk alone". I would urge you to keep on keeping on regardless...

[Vicomte]

Goldyloppers trittly-how in the early mordy, and she falolloped down the steps. Oh unfortunade for cracking of the eggers and the sheebs and the buttery full-falollop and graze the knee-clappers. So she had a Vaselubrious, rub it on and a quick healy huff and that was that.

[Athnuachan]

If you can't beat them join them, eh Vicomte?

At least this is entertaining!
Totally irrelevant, of course, but so are the posts which "messed up" what could have been an interesting discussion.

Apathy of late? Just read this thread in its entirety to see why.

[abby]

What a dick.

Apathy of late? Just read this thread in its entirety to see why.