This is a great verse. In a way I interpret that it completes/expounds Leonard's movement from the Monastry back to "Boogie Street".
Book of Mercy,31.
Then the dangerous moment comes: I am too great to ask for help. I have other hopes. I legislate from the fortress of my disappointments, with a set jaw. Overthrow this even terror with a sweet remembrance: when I was with you, when my soul delighted you, when I was what you wanted. My heart sings of your longing for me, and my thoughts climb down to marvel at your mercy. I do not fear as you gather up my days. Your name is the sweetness of time, and you carry me close into the night, speaking consolations, drawing down lights from the sky, saying, See how the night has no terror for one who remembers the Name.
“Then the dangerous moment comes:”
When I am doing well in every-day life and my focus is not You, but those other pleasures, then in that distraction I am in danger of undervaluing our spiritual relationship. I forget my life’s mission, which is to know and love You.
“I am too great to ask for help. I have other hopes.”
While distracted in those pleasures and activities of life, too often I forget my prayers, my spiritual longings.
“I legislate from the fortress of my disappointments, with a set jaw.”
But now, determined, I make my own laws to govern my own behavior. I remind myself what it is like to be miserable without you. And knowing this misery strengthens my resolve to keep you in mind at all times…So I “set” my jaw to keep you ever-present and fixed at the still point of my turning world.
“Overthrow this even terror with a sweet remembrance: when I was with you, when my soul delighted you, when I was what you wanted.”
Sure, I am terrified of losing you. I longed for you mercy and you gave it.
I knew You.
And I know you again through the process of remembering.
So I activate my memory, my sweet memories of our time together. And through this remembering I am again strengthened and spiritually renewed.
And I remember too; that this was a two-way love affair ! You wanted Me! And I love you all the more for that.
I delighted You while You delighted me.
“My heart sings of your longing for me, and my thoughts climb down to marvel at your mercy.”
I set this in stone; I will not forget this moment when you “dance(d) me to the end of Love”
I will reflect on this
I will meditate on this
I will contemplate among this
I will sing this, over and over and over..
And this will strengthen me.
“ I do not fear as you gather up my days. Your name is the sweetness of time, and you carry me close into the night, speaking consolations, drawing down lights from the sky, saying, See how the night has no terror for one who remembers the Name.”
And as I grow old and in times of doubt and forgetfulness; as I head towards those twin journeys of doubt and death, I only have to think/speak your Name to conjure up your love and my salvation.
Blessed be Your Name.
Blessed be our Love.
I will remember you; I will whisper Your Name, and you will be with me always in that process of remembering, "on Boogie Street" (every-day life).
Matj