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Karren B wrote: ↑Sat Nov 25, 2017 2:44 pm Touché you win!

My mother told me
Never play with the big boys
They’re hard to handle

I’ll jog on now if you don’t mind...

your mother looks very pleasant, thank you for sharing her charming photo

You're welcome.

Karren B wrote: ↑Sat Nov 25, 2017 11:47 pm You're welcome.

what a genetically freaky coincidence, that's exactly what she said the last time I met her.

solongleonard wrote: ↑Sun Nov 26, 2017 12:53 am

Karren B wrote: ↑Sat Nov 25, 2017 11:47 pm You're welcome.

what a genetically freaky coincidence, that's exactly what she said the last time I met her.

She always was a very polite lady, that’s probably why I'm such a good girl…

Things my mother taught me:

Religion….. “You better pray that comes out of the carpet”
Logic………. “Because I said so, that’s why”
Foresight….. “Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you’re in an accident”
Stamina…. “You’ll sit there till all that spinach is gone”
Irony……… “Keep crying and I’ll give you something to cry about”
Anticipation…… “Wait till I get you home”
Roots….. “Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?”
Hypocrisy……. “If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a million times. Don’t exaggerate”
Wisdom…. “When you get to my age you’ll know what I mean”
Justice….. “One day you’ll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!!”

I’m sure many here were taught the same things by their mothers…

Things Karren's mother allegedly taught her

Religion….. “You better pray that comes out of the carpet”
Logic………. “Because I said so, that’s why”
Foresight….. “Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you’re in an accident”
Stamina…. “You’ll sit there till all that spinach is gone”
Irony……… “Keep crying and I’ll give you something to cry about”
Anticipation…… “Wait till I get you home”
Roots….. “Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?”
Hypocrisy……. “If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a million times. Don’t exaggerate”
Wisdom…. “When you get to my age you’ll know what I mean”
Justice….. “One day you’ll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!!”

Things Karren's mother should have taught her instead

Religion….. “You better pray kneeling on a corner of that carpet”
Logic………. “Pretzel flavour”
Foresight….. “removed from many Jewish male babies”
Stamina…. “Spinach? You're 'avin' a laff, Geezer. Popeye was on Speed”
Irony……… “I have 2 shirty and one pair of trousery”
Anticipation…… “you must be patient for my answer”
Roots….. “Your proper soccer days are behind you. I support Barnet ”
Hypocrisy……. “I could give a much better line than that”
Wisdom…. “Sir Norman Joseph https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Norman_Wisdom"
Justice….. “but no lemon in my coke”

Things Karren's mother should have taught her instead. I think she had most of it covered.

Religion….. “You better pray kneeling on a corner of that carpet” She also told me to wear knee pads to avoid carpet burns
Logic………. “Pretzel flavour” Women don’t do logic, it’s overrated.
Foresight….. “removed from many Jewish male babies” She didn’t teach me that; I found that one out for myself.
Stamina…. “Spinach? You're 'avin' a laff, Geezer. Popeye was on Speed” Speed will give you a 30 minute high and a week of flashbacks.
Irony……… “I have 2 shirty and one pair of trousery” I think we should leave the ironing to sideways.
Anticipation…… “you must be patient for my answer” Always!
Roots….. “Your proper soccer days are behind you. I support Barnet ” Do they still play??
Hypocrisy……. “I could give a much better line than that” I’m sure you could.
Wisdom…. “Sir Norman Joseph https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Norman_Wisdom" Very predictable solong, I saw that one coming…
Justice….. “but no lemon in my coke” I prefer a single malt and I prefer it naked.

I think we learned more from our mothers than we care to admit… The only thing they didn’t teach us was how to survive without them. We have to figure that one out for ourselves… I’m still working on that one!

Karren B wrote: ↑Mon Nov 27, 2017 11:21 pm Things Karren's mother should have taught her instead. I think she had most of it covered.

Religion….. “You better pray kneeling on a corner of that carpet” She also told me to wear knee pads to avoid carpet burns
Logic………. “Pretzel flavour” Women don’t do logic, it’s overrated.
Foresight….. “removed from many Jewish male babies” She didn’t teach me that; I found that one out for myself.
Stamina…. “Spinach? You're 'avin' a laff, Geezer. Popeye was on Speed” Speed will give you a 30 minute high and a week of flashbacks.
Irony……… “I have 2 shirty and one pair of trousery” I think we should leave the ironing to sideways.
Anticipation…… “you must be patient for my answer” Always!
Roots….. “Your proper soccer days are behind you. I support Barnet ” Do they still play??
Hypocrisy……. “I could give a much better line than that” I’m sure you could.
Wisdom…. “Sir Norman Joseph https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Norman_Wisdom" Very predictable solong, I saw that one coming…
Justice….. “but no lemon in my coke” I prefer a single malt and I prefer it naked.

I think we learned more from our mothers than we care to admit… The only thing they didn’t teach us was how to survive without them. We have to figure that one out for ourselves… I’m still working on that one!

I get a disproportionate satisfaction knowing you didn’t get the pretzel or the coke comments. That makes the whole 3 minutes for all my answers worth it.

Solong wrote
I get a disproportionate satisfaction knowing you didn’t get the pretzel or the coke comments. That makes the whole 3 minutes for all my answers worth it.

In my opinion pretzels have no flavour at all, though I’m not sure where the logic is in that, and although you take your coke with just ice and no lemon I still prefer my single malt naked (without any additions).
Sincere apologies sir for not being as smart or as fast as you. You do know speed isn’t always a good thing; unless you’re against a lamp post on a very cold night.

Karren B wrote: ↑Tue Nov 28, 2017 9:05 pm

Solong wrote
I get a disproportionate satisfaction knowing you didn’t get the pretzel or the coke comments. That makes the whole 3 minutes for all my answers worth it.

In my opinion pretzels have no flavour at all, though I’m not sure where the logic is in that, and although you take your coke with just ice and no lemon I still prefer my single malt naked (without any additions).
Sincere apologies sir for not being as smart or as fast as you. You do know speed isn’t always a good thing; unless you’re against a lamp post on a very cold night.

Pretzel Logic by Steely Dan, a fine album of its time. Rikki don’t lose that number, Dee Dee dum Dee Dee ...

Lemon is evil in drinks, apart from Lemon Tea, I guess

That's a great song but I had no idea which album it was from. Nice one!

For those who don't know the song, though I'm sure most will.
https://youtu.be/UfZWp-hGCdA

Not keen on lemons in drinks but I do like lemon tea and I have a freshly squeezed lemon every morning; it makes your mouth pucker a bit but its good for you...well I haven't had a cold for years so it must be working.

So must be working
Haven’t had a cold for years
Naked iron’s hot

Sideways wrote: ↑Mon Dec 25, 2017 9:52 pm So must be working
Haven’t had a cold for years
Naked iron’s hot

Naked Iron’s hot
Board stiff and ready to go
Getting quite steamy

getting quite steamy
I, Ron's hot, press me harder
'til I orgasm

solongleonard wrote: ↑Fri Dec 29, 2017 12:21 am getting quite steamy
I, Ron's hot, press me harder
'til I orgasm

why don't you shut up, you absurd fake. "so long?". I doubt it, more like MInnie Mouse I have heard. I suggest you don't step out of your depth again, Loser.

Sideways wrote: ↑Fri Dec 29, 2017 12:25 am

solongleonard wrote: ↑Fri Dec 29, 2017 12:21 am getting quite steamy
I, Ron's hot, press me harder
'til I orgasm

why don't you shut up, you absurd fake. "so long?". I doubt it, more like MInnie Mouse I have heard. I suggest you don't step out of your depth again, Loser.

thank you for your pleasant seasonal greetings, Sideways